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Me in middle school:  Fakes sick to get out of running the mile in gym class Me now:  Pays to run 13.1 miles
If you think you can just win me over  with some running shoes and a puppy... you're damn right.
It's one of those days where If I don't go for a run, you'll be lucky not to see me on the news.
When it comes to Saturdays, I'm either running a million miles or I'm not  leaving my bed. There is no  in between.
Things new runners never saw coming
You know you're a runner when...  you've tried to convince a friend to run a 5k with you because  "it's ONLY 3.1 miles."
Something only a runner would  understand... Traveling somewhere new to run a race IS a vacation !!
I'm in such a good place right now... I mean, not emotionally...just that I'm at the running store.
Teach your children the joy of running and they'll never have enough money  to buy drugs.
**Username or Password incorrect**  Hey, STRAVA..... why can't you just  tell me which one?
***Friday night*** ME:  "I'ma go home to change and  then meet y'all down there later."
"Daddy, why did Mommy run past our house?" "Because she misjudged the distance of her long run, so she can't come back home until her Garmin  tells her it's OK."
I'm sorry if I don't wave or smile back at you while I'm running. It's just that I'm trying very hard to not die.
TRACK:  the only time it's okay for  a man with a gun to tell you to take your pants off.
FRIEND:  What do you think about  while you're running? ME:  Walking.
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