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*loses 3 lbs* (Next Instagram post) "If anybody needs help with their diet or coaching, email me. Rates-$250/month"
Rest Day.  AKA "Thinking about running all day" Day.
My week is basically:  *Monday *Monday #2 *Monday #3 *Monday #4 *Friday *Saturday *Pre-Monday
Difficulty sitting on a toilet?  Dread even the sight of stairs?  Difficulty getting out of bed?  Difficulty walking?  DIAGNOSIS:  Ran a marathon!
I used to be able to drink all weekend. Now, a night of drinking requires more recovery time than my last marathon!
Some days I run to LOSE myself,  other days I run to FIND myself.  But most days I run because  I want to add to my  bling collection.
Run like there's a hot guy in front of you & a creepy one behind you.
Hey girl... Run your heart out. I'll be at the finish line.
When your friends suggest that you could just skip the run....  "You think this is a game?"
Cross-training... My brain said "crunches" but my stomach  auto-corrected it to "cupcakes".
Nothing in the world can make you feel hotter than boob sweat.
I do not spew profanities. I enunciate them clearly, like a f*cking lady.
Next time someone asks you how much you weigh, tell them on hundred and sexy.
I am currently experiencing this run at 15 WTFs per hour.
I'm at that point in my life where  I consider wearing my hair down as making an effort.
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