unicorn medal: you want me me: I want you baby
Me lifting weights only after 5pm 'cause I know it's prime MILF hours
We all know a goofy fun person w/a horrible temper and anger issues
Why are people who run ultras still using a car
Tell me you're a runner without  telling me you are a runner
I was running intervals to improve my speed, but now I'm only doing it  to impress the lovely MILFs
3 Cupcakes equal 534 Cal or 5 miles... I could give up cupcakes, but I'm not  a quitter
Was gonna upload a selfie from  today's run but it's raining and I don't want y'all getting wet twice
Normalize no BQ Virtual Boston Marathon. It's self care
GPS Watch: Connected  Me: then fccking act like it
Running ultras is one thing.... but bitch you a throat goat too
Me seeing a personal trainer who needs a personal trainer
I paused my Garmin to text you back  don't ever question my loyalty
When your friends suggest that you  could just skip the workout...  "You think this is a game?"
Friends that listen to your same  problems without getting fed up  hearing it 100 times are  the TRUE friends
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