Therapist: and what do we do when  we feel like this?  Me: sign up for another race  Therapist: No
Trying to convince my wife to train for a marathon just so I don’t have to buy her a Pelaton
Tag the most dramatic runner you know
"wyd after your afternoon run??"  going to bed bro i ain't no super hero
Does anyone else pack running gear  for a trip like they're planning  to run around the whole  country twice for every  day they're gone?
Parenting question – At what age do  you tell your cross country runner son cheerleaders only fuck football players?
Obstacles are important....  Some people run with  weights. I jerk off an hour  before a long run to deplete  my adrenaline
“On your left!” What, did I have my hazards on, motherfucker? Just go  around quietly
Pro tip – Get shit faced and leave your  car at the bar and Uber home. You’ve  just planned tomorrow morning’s run.
Runners are obnoxious, sure, but at  least we’re not cyclists. You gotta draw  the line somewhere… and it’s pedaling, ya losers
Best way to hit that PR pace? Run in  high crime areas. Keeps your heartbeat elevated and testosterone pumping
Hill workouts mfs… because BDSM is  for pussies
Question for meteorologists... On a loop run, why is the wind in my fucking face after EVERY turn?
There should be a championship where athletes can take as many drugs as they want. Like fuck it, let's see how fast humans can really run
She likes surprises. Not the finger in  the ass without permission kind, but running shoes are always nice
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