eBibs

Yelling "you're almost there!" Is strictly forbidden until mile 25
I just want to drink wine, get sponsored by Nike, get paid to run,  and eat Pizza!
Crazy how I used to get up at 5AM and  run 7 to 10 miles.... These days I won't even get up at 5AM to pee.  I will just lie there in pain.
What the f*ck should I wear  to the living room today
I wish everything was as easy as  getting fat
JLo and Ben Affleck are back together,  Lindsay Lohan is starring in a new  movie, and I'm still trying to get  a BQ.... Hello 2004
I'm dig'n the new upgrade on the Nike+ App. It pauses your run when you have  to stop to wait for traffic.   It would also be beneficial  if I were to pass out!
Dear liver, This 'working from home' will be rough, stay strong
When you go for a run and completely forget how out of shapes you are...  Your slow run  feels like a max  heart rate test
Ok QUESTION of the day: when leaving  the house... does anyone tell  their pets they will be  home later?
I was in a running store today and  this girl walked in, looked at me  and went "hello, where are  the Nike Alphafly Next%?"  like girl I don't work  here but aisle 8
Yes, your 'recovery meal' after a half-marathon lasts exactly 13.1 days  & includes all the foods you haven't eaten in so long you forgot how much  you missed them.
Therapist: and what do we do when  we feel like this?  Me: sign up for another race  Therapist: no
RUNNING... Because where else can  you dress like this and be accepted  at our age?
You know they didn't make arrests  because they saw the video, they made the arrests because we saw the video.  Remember that.  #irunwithmaud
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