eBibs

I'm glad I'm only competing with myself because everyone else is kicking my ass.
Waiter: careful the food is hot The food:
Older man in New Balance 407 : "Where's your mask, asshole." Me in Alphafly Next% : "I'm vaccinated, peasant."
If you are reading this........ you're not running.... So please stop scrolling and fix your fucking posture you look like a croissant
30s may be the new 20s but 9pm is the new midnight.
Please God - if you can't make me fast, make my friends slow!!
Before my run VS After my run
TRIATHLON Why suck at only one sport when you can suck at three
"My only talent is that I just don't quit." ~David Goggins
You know you're a runner when... you spend hours in the mall, find nothing to wear. Spend 10 minutes in the running store, find hundreds of dollars worth of stuff you want to buy.
RUNNING OXYMORONS: *easy five miles *"only" a half marathon *humble marathoner *sanitary porta potty *ten perfect toenails *pre-run stretches *fast recovery YIKES!!
That morning run hits a lil better when your life a little fucked up
GROUP RUNS... 5 minutes of friendly conversation followed by 1 hour of listening to lots of people breathing really hard.
"Is this a sore throat? Is this just allergies? Caught in a lockdown No escape from reality. Mama, just killed a man I didn't stay inside in bed I walked by him and now he's dead" **CORONAVIRUS RHAPSODY**
If you can't handle me at my worst (aka when I don't run) then fair enough tbh I'm completely fucking ridiculous
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