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PSALM 26:2 "Test me, Lord, and try me, examine my heart and my mind"

When Karen asks what you’re training for... “LIFE, Karen. I’m training for LIFE.”

I hate going to the kitchen after my long run and finding out i'm the only snack in the house

Does anyone else whisper "what the f*ck" to themselves at least 57 times in the first 2 miles or is it just me

I actually have feelings for my bed

There should be a championship where athletes can take as many drugs as they want. Like f*ck it, let's see how fast humans can really run

Sometimes I wonder if all these running injuries are happening because I didn't forward that message to 10 people

People be like, “I got 99 problems...” and I’m over here like, “...have you ever tried running?”

hoodie

Me: I'll add 2 miles to my long run... How harder could it be? Also me:

First we do the running, then we do the things...

If you eat GU on your off days from running, are you a weirdo? Asking for a friend.

You know you're a runner when something cracks almost every time you move

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Me: I'll run 5 today Garmin: 5.12 miles Me: wow looks like I gotta run 6 now

"Money can't buy you happiness." My friend and I buying happiness:

OMG! I haven't seen you in forever! Let's stand in everyone's way and talk about our annoying kids

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