New Featured eBibs

Some guys have bigger boobs than  me but hey, I'm a distance runner
Don't blame the quarantine, chubbs. You were 25 lbs overweight before you were locked down with  a pallet of snacks
I'm thankful cars were invented....  Imagine waking your horse up at 2AM to go get some dick
Being a runner is mf expensive
Day 62 of quarantine: I haven't run  a real race in 4 years
I look like I'm having deep thoughts, but 98% of the time  I'm thinking about what I am going  to eat next
You have to give marathoners credit...  There is no one else that runs 40 plus miles a week yet still gain weight
Is it just me or did EVERYONE just say fuck the rona this week? Lol
My brain: "Pass them " Me: "Why? " My brain: "You gotta "
Crazy how I used to get up at 5AM and  run 7 to 10 miles.... These days I won't even get up at 5AM to pee.  I will just lie there in pain.
*early morning run*  During the first mile: f*ck this,  I'm tired as f*uck  During the last mile:  f*ck yeah baby, that's  what I call a good run. I can't wait for tomorrow!!
Runners be like... Every pizza is a  personal pizza if you try hard enough  and believe in yourself
Literally no-one:  Me: I cant breathe in this gotdamn mask
I wanna be a triathlete –but also, yikes
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