No matter how good you feel on your run... There will always be a woman pushing a stroller that's running  faster than you.
Scientific research suggests that  runners lose both their sense of personal space and smell after completing a race.
The Track: Where you go to run in circles in order to make progress.
Those 3 days after your marathon where you regret  laughing at the "life alert" lady.  "I've fallen and I can't get up!"
Look out!!!! I've got my let's-run-the-sh*t- outta-these-miles essential oil all over me!
When  non-runner friends ask if you are free this weekend... "Sorry, I have to do my long run.. then I'm going to  lay around all weekend recovering  from my long run."
What's worse than running 1.50 miles  and realizing you didn't turn on your  GPS watch?????? NOTHING.
I'm sorry for what I said  before I had  my run.
Why does the need to pee intensify by  a million after you start running a race?
Most people don't realize this, but you can run without telling Facebook  about it.
WORKOUT SCHEDULE: Monday: 3 (easy) miles Tuesday: track workout Wednesday: sore day Thursday: sleep in - miss run Friday: 5 miles or pizza/wine Saturday: run... to get donuts Saturday: Marathon (NETFLIX)
The moment your Garmin dies.  It's like the run never happened...
Some days you eat salads and go to  the gym. Some days you eat cupcakes and refuse to put on pants.  It's called balance.
Running friend (n): One who listens, doesn't judge and somehow makes 2 hours or running fun!
No headphones = You can talk to me.  One headphone = You can talk to me  ...if I like you.  Two headphones = F@*k off.
Never underestimate the strength of a woman. Never mess with one that runs 13.1 miles for fun.
UltraRunning... If you die, we split your gear.
The question is never "do I want to run?"  The question is always "if I run, do I have to  wash my hair?"
The only thing working harder than  me during a run is my sports bra.
Joggers bounce up and down at red lights. Runners just stand there  looking pissed.
Ultrarunning. If you die, we split your gear!
My friends are all "Fall... pumpkin  lattes, Uggs, sweaters"...  and I'm over here...  "Fall... cooler runs... Duh!"
It's all fun & games till ...  your jeans don't fit anymore.
Some days even my lucky rocket ship underpants won't help.
During sex you burn as much calories  as running for 5 miles. Who the f**k  runs 5 miles in 30 seconds??
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